Running, Drinking, and Surviving

Sometimes I wonder...if I had everything I think I want, would I then be content? I don't think I would. I think I'm one of those people always looking for something else. The next big thing. The next adventure. And I'm finally hitting the point where I'm wondering--is this all there is? I thought some day I'd feel fulfilled, content, like I fit perfectly somewhere. But that day has never arrived. Even after I got married in 2009...I came home from the honeymoon on a Tuesday, had the rest of the week off to clean and rest up. But I just sat there...in the dark...motionless and depressed. Like--this is it? This isn't any different than being unmarried. I'm still missing something. Some would say I need a child to be fulfilled, but I've never wanted children.*  It's just not the right thing for me. Then there's my career--I make a modest salary in public service. I'm sure some people think more money would make me happy. But alas, I tried p...

If you've ever wondered what a 3 day first date to Disney World is like, then THIS is the blog post for you. For the sake of not getting sued, we'll call him "Tacky Tim"... Friday 5:51pm - Plane lands at Orlando International Airport, Text to Tacky Tim, who expects my plane to arrive at 6pm 6:05pm - Text from Tacky Tim that he won't be there until at least 6:30pm (well after my flight is due to arrive) *Note: I offered to grab an uber to meet him so he didn't have to fetch me and to expedite matters 6:45pm - Tacky Tim finally arrives to pick me up, we get in his car and have an awkward ride to Disney World; he's wearing a Hawaiian shirt, hiking shoes, and tri-colored dark socks pulled half way up his calf...and a fanny pack 7:15ish - Tacky Tim scams his way into parking at the Polynesian by lying to the security guard, we get in line for a Dole Whip where he promptly leaves me b/c he's old and apparently needs to piss every five seconds; he c...

So I was listening to a podcast last night (link below, all credit due to Stuff Mom Never Told You) on my drive home from an interview. The interview went great. The interviewer essentially told me I had the job subject to some red tape. But it was in Northern Indiana. Now, there's nothing wrong  with Northern Indiana, but I'm from Southern Indiana. The furthest north that I've lived was Indianapolis, which is smack in the middle of the state. And when living in Indy, I mainly stayed on the south side of the City. I just felt more comfortable there.  Regardless, the podcast didn't have anything to do with geography, but it addressed the compulsion of perfectionism. It was as if I was driving through a City that felt like home to me (Indy) while hearing a podcast describing me to a T. It contained some startling revelations, and yet explained so very much. When I was younger, I was super critical of my sister's girlfriend. My mom, a true mom, defended my reaction...

Dear Chris (I’d call you Mr. Evans, but you’re slightly younger than me)-- This is an apology. For all the women who profess a love for you when we’ve never met you. I know I’m guilty of this.  It seems totally cray cray.  And while I don’t claim to be the most mentally stable person on earth, I’ve got a decent grip on reality.  I would never actually, physically stalk a person or cause harm to another unless it was necessary to protect myself or others.  I do feel the need to explain this odd obsession that has developed, however. When I was younger, I thought I was in love with Donnie Wahlberg (fellow Bostonian, maybe we have a pattern), but alas it was merely a crush of a pre-teen.  Then there was Luke Perry--oh Dylan, you were so tragically hot.  I’m sure there were others, but those were the poster boys of my youth.  I didn’t know these people at all. I saw them on tv acting, or performing in music videos, but that was about it. I never even saw N...